Update on Life after Kenya

As I have been back from Kenya, I realize more & more how terrible of a blogger I am, but I want to give an update on what God is doing in my life now. 

On July 22, I returned from a place where my heart still resides, Kenya.  As each day goes by, I think about the details of that place  – the smells of pollution, the sites of trash all over the roads, the markets full of fruits & veggies, the strong women carrying a 5 gallon jug of water on their heads and wood on their backs, people just laying on the side of the road taking a nap, Safari Com buildings, the dust, the craziness of Nairobi traffic, cars honking & running stop lights on the round-abouts, the pressure of some Kenyans trying to sell you something while you sit in the traffic (some climbing through the window to try and get money) people running up to you saying “Mzungu, mzungu – give me your watch”, “give me money” … as weird as it sounds, I really miss all of these things, but the things I miss the most are the laughter and smiles of the kids, the gratefulness of the people, the silly jokes from the Mendonsas, God's beauty of the mountains, & seeing the growth of Naomi’s Village.

As I reflect each day, I get more and more excited to go back soon, hopefully.  God has grown my faith in Him, which is one thing I realize was absolutely necessary for the journey He is continuing me on.

On July 22, there was not one thing inside of me that knew where to look – only to Jesus.  I had no idea where to turn, which direction to go, except to run toward Him.  I felt as if I were in the middle of an empty field, slowly spinning, and asking God “hmmm alrighty, God.  Now what?”  I wasn’t going back to my Asst. Director job at camp, so what was I supposed to do that would be meaningful to God’s glory?  For weeks, I really had NO idea.  I applied at random places and received some opportunities, but kept feeling like God was saying “no”, so I’d have to turn them down or God would just do it for me.  After 5 weeks, I felt like God said don’t apply for anymore full time jobs - which was a bit hard to understand initially because we all need an income.  In this mix of time, I got connected with a guy named Nate Allen Wilson, who runs ‘The Last Frontier Agency’ which, among many things, does mission trips, & international photography for families overseas who have never had a family portrait of themselves.  As I spoke with Nate and his wife, Meg, I began to share an idea with them about a documentary idea that I knew God gave me.  Fast forward to today - a little over a month after our initial meeting – he is now the Producer & Co-Director to the documentary about global disabilities I've been wanting to make - a documentary that just seemed like a dream 6 months ago that I thought might not actually every happen.  But now ... now - IT IS HAPPENING!  I cannot begin to explain the excitement that is in my heart, soul, and any other depth I have in my body.  There are times when I am in my house and I just scream and start laughing or dancing around because I'm so excited about what God is doing, even though I have absolutely no idea what lies ahead.  I am extremely grateful to Him because He chose me to be a part of this journey.  I never asked to love people with disabilities - God just gave that to me and WOW - what a HUGE gift it really is - to have the opportunity in this short life to know and love this population is incredible & indescribable.  From being an Assistant Camp Director at a camp for children and adults with disabilities to becoming the Director & Writer of a Documentary - I am in awe of what God is up to.  IT IS SO CRAZY!!  The importance is not in what title I had or have or will have, but the importance is that I allow God to stay in the center of this documentary and lead every step of the way. He is bringing people into our crew that have a heart to make a difference for Him and His children.  I pray the documentary spreads and educates people all over the world about the importance of those with disabilities.   For a couple of weeks, when I would say “Nate, my producer…...” all I could do was laugh because it sounded so foreign & unreal to me.  I can now say it with a straight face, but will continue to giggle when initially using more terms like “Director of Photography”, “Editor”, “Executive Producer” (hoping to say this one a lot) …. and other movie terms that just don't seem like I, Lindsey Castilleja, should be saying in the context of 'my world'.  I'm enjoying the new 'world of film' and how much potential it has for necessary information to get into the hands of people all over the globe … but more so, to promote change and inspire hope to people that are in dire need of it.

(had to put this in there, because excitement is overflowing)

Even though there is so much excitement going on with the documentary, I am still not getting paid to do it right now.  We are about to have fundraisers and get the money in to get this project done!  Hopefully I will have a part-time job this time next week (pray for an interview happening tomorrow), but no matter what – God is good, faithful, and will provide.  How exciting is that!!??  God is also allowing me to go to India Nov. 17 - 28 on a mission trip in hopes that we will be able to work part of the time with people with disabilities. woo hoo.  I'm very excited to see a new country and a new culture.

There is one song that I continue to play on my guitar and sing each day that says exactly where I am right now in my life and relates so much to what God is teaching me:

Matt Redman’s “Never Once”

http://youtu.be/6jJXWij5RMs

The lyrics say:

Never once did we ever walk alone.

Never once did You leave us on our own.

You are faithful, God.  You are faithful.

Every step we are breathing in Your grace.

Evermore we’ll be breathing out Your praise.

You are faithful, God.  You are faithful.

You are faithful, God.  You are faithful.

You are faithful, God.  You are faithful.

Whatever this little journey that I am on right now turns into, I know that God is faithful through it all.

Blessings,

Lindsey

Preparing Heart to say Goodbye

As the time I have in Kenya is coming to an end I really don’t know if I have many words to describe the time I’ve spent here.  How could I explain the joy, laughter, pain, sympathy, anger, compassion, & wonder I have felt in the past two months?  I can’t.

Before I came, I always said the following: “I could live overseas for a few months at a time, and maybe if I met someone that wanted to spend their life overseas I could do it long-term.”  This two months has made me restate the following to: “I could live overseas long-term if and when God calls me to do so.”

I am looking forward to coming back to the United States in search of Christ & growth in in my relationship with Him.  I will be honest in saying, I would absolutely love to stay, but I really feel like that is the “easy way out” for me not to face some things my heart needs in the states.  I need a dependency on God because I feel like I have never actually had that.  I am going back to Dallas with no job, not very much money in my bank account, & with a heart that is ready to see God and depend on Him & Him alone.

Before leaving the US to come here, I thought it was going to be easy to leave come July because I knew I wouldn’t have people with disabilities as the focus in my life – so I figured it would just be an easy goodbye. Well, now that it is July 14, that is definitely not the case.  These 21 kids at Naomi’s Village now feel like my brothers and sisters.  This is not camp – this is not a place they go for one week, be crazy, have fun, and leave.  This is their home.  They will have so many struggles, celebrations, & growth in the next 18 years here.  Naomi’s Village is their place to gain knowledge about Christ, their place to be disciplined in love, their place to have fun, and their place to have a family.  Each kid from Baby Evans to Zakayo has a very special place in my heart and in a way, I feel as if I am bailing out on them by leaving.  It feels like I’m throwing the consistency, that I’ve been trying to teach them, out the door by going home. 

Two months was just enough time for me to get into my routine, for the kids to really get to know me, and listen to me even though they may not fully understand what I am saying.  Two months was just enough time for me to gain a better perspective of who God is.  Two months was just enough time for me to hear Baby Evans giggle for the first time.  Two months was just enough time for me to fall in love with Jesus in a way I haven’t before.  Two months was just the enough time to leave me wanting more.

What to do?

Well, I have decided that I am by far one of the worst bloggers in the history of bloggers!  I know I should be better at this, but I am just not.

So much has happened since June 21:

On June 22, we went to one of the workers' house about 30 minutes away to meet his son, who is 10 years old with Cerebral Palsy.  He has never had a wheelchair, and is now too big for them to carry to and from town, church etc.  The mother stays at home all day with the son, but has some chickens to take care of so she has something to do.  On Sundays the family goes to church without the kids, meaning there is a 3 year old boy to "care for" the 10 year old for a few hours.  The father of this son is by far one of the nicest men I have ever met.  One of the greatest things is that he hasn't run away from his family, even in the midst of it being difficult.  He knows that God has a purpose and has chosen him to be a father to this boy.  Throughout the boy's life, they have been told they can get help through different organizations, but they would go and try, pay money, but never receive services.  I left this house with my heart so full, yet so empty.  The good news about this situation is for the circumstances, this boy actually has it good - maybe not as best as he could, but really it is good.  He has two parents that absolutely love him, which is more than a lot of kids in countries like this.  Soon I will meet a girl who needs a wheelchair that lives in the IDP camp that gets locked in her house everyday so her single mother can go to work.  People say that if the house wasn't locked, they believe that people would go in there to steal or to tease the girl.  Please pray.

 Heidi, Tim, and I went to Lake Nakuru for a safari.  We did not see lions this time, but we did see the cool looking lizard on top there!  It was wonderful because we explored a bit more than I got to on my last safari and we also stopped for a nice lunch.  We definitely didn't feel like we were in a 3rd world country at this little place.  It was very relaxing.

Tim and I became "Woody & Thelma" for some skits for the kids.  The first day Tim was covered with a snuggie with his arms behind his back and me right behind him with my arms popping out for the kids to see.  Tim had no idea what my arms would do and I had no idea what he would say.  The skit was for me to get him ready in the morning meaning: shaving, brushing teeth, drinking water, singing a song, ...etc.  The next day we switched roles.  My face was out and Tim's arms were in control.  He put makeup all over my face (picture above) and I surprised Tim by saying I needed my fingernails painted.  Let's also say that we didn't give him nail polish remover until late that night and I think he still went home with some red on his cuticles.  The best day of all was when Bob and Julie became the faces with Tim as Julie's arms and me as Bob's short little arms.  If you have facebook, you should get on and watch all three videos!  HILARIOUS ... especially of Bob and Julie.  They are pros!

The Lost Orphans team built a swing set for the kids.  For all of them, it was a first for swinging.  One of the best memories I have is of them on it and cheering each other on, waiting for their turn to see what it was like.  They absolutely love the swing!!!

Tim and I traveled by Matatu to Maai Mahiu for a few hours to spend at Comfort the Children and search for an internet card through the alleys of this town.  On the way there, we were stopped by the police.  He came to my door and basically said that I could be arrested, taken to jail, spend the night there, and go to court for not having my seatbelt on.  I will not lie, I was a bit nervous, but if I was going down I was taking Tim with me.  I told him over and over again that I didn't know that it was a "law" to wear a seatbelt and in my head I was thinking "This is really of concern to them?  There is so much more going on in this town."  He then asks "Do you want to pay a fee?"  As he was talking he and the driver were both smiling so Tim knew something was up and chimed in and told the officer that I didn't want to pay a fee to him.  Basically, they were after money and a good laugh.  At times the matatu drivers and police officers will team up again "white people" that come in and try and make a buck or two off of them.  Well, they got zilch out of me this time.  

 We visited Comfort the Children in hopes to see the kids.  As luck would have it, the kids were on break, but we did get to visit with the mothers, which was awesome!  they are currently making these things called "L.I.F.E. Jackets" which are little coffee cup holders so your hands don't get burned.  They are tons of fun, so I bought a few and will probably buy some more the next time I go.  (great presents with a good meaning)

I am a huge fan of soaking in God's beauty through sunsets, so I wanted to climb to the top of the water tower at Naomi's Village, but did not make it all the way this time, but Tim caught a pretty cool picture of my attempt.  (Eventually I did go all the way up another day, but was real nervous of getting down, so my roommate - Heidi - had to come help rescue me)

Just the other day, I strapped Baby Evans to my back and took a walk.  As we were leaving for our walk, he was a little fussy, as anyone would be sitting like that - so I grabbed my guitar.  I had my guitar in front, him on my back and a nice African sunset awaiting me for some dang good Jesus time.  We sang and played for probably 30 - 45 minutes.  One of the prettiest sunsets in the past month.

 One hot Saturday, the kids needed something to do so what better way to use water than water balloon fight.  It started out as a simple game of tossing a balloon around, then just got better and better.  We ended up on the top of the balcony dropping the balloons on the kids.  They loved it!!!  We also filled up a bucket of water and let them have it.  I can't explain the joy the kids had and just how much fun it was for them - and for us to be a part of that.  (video on Facebook as well).

That following day I was sick again! ahhhhh this time, my stomach felt like something was eating it away.  I didn't hold anything down that day and spent a good portion of my day staring at the bottom of the toilet.  I was not a happy person, but good news - I felt better the next day.

 I had decided that I haven't officially celebrated the 4th of July since 2007 because of being at camp and not actually going out and seeing fireworks having a bar-b-que etc..... So this year, we celebrated Kenyan style by not officially celebrating an American holiday, but by making signs for all the people in the US that help support Naomi's Village.  We watched fireworks via YouTube and the kids were amazed and quiet - which amazed me!! :-)  We are planning a night of fireworks for them hopefully before I leave.  That will be absolutely amazing!

Well, today July 8th I look at my time left here at Naomi's Village and can honestly say that I am not ready to come back home.  It is extremely hard for me to wrap my mind around what life will be like again - partially because I will not have a job when I get back.  I've had a job since I was 15 years old so it will be very different.  But you also cannot imagine the excitement I feel in that because God will be in control and I will not be able to have the security of a paycheck right away, but only live by faith.  I somewhat delight in the idea of all the options there really are to me right now.  I can do anything, but will say that the only thing I want to do is follow what God has.  My selfish being does not want to move out of Dallas, but I am praying that I become a little more open hearted about that if it is His plan.  I have this big dream that - maybe, just maybe over the next 6 months I can find a job where I can strike it rich and travel for the first half of the year next year making a documentary about international disabilities.  WOW!!  I would love that.  I've considered finding a job overseas to even teach.

The "American/Person that cares about what other people think" side of me wants to have a "real job", but there is something in my heart that doesn't want to get a "real job" right now because I want to be able to be flexible in the next 6 months.  I've struggled with this American way of thinking that in order to be considered successful, you have to have a full time job where you have health benefits, a nice salary, and be in charge of people.  All of those things are nice, and I was very blessed to have all of those things I just mentioned, but that was not the thing that made me successful - some of it actually made me a little prideful.  Having success in life isn't about those things - it is about following hard after God - and in that I am not sure that I can really consider myself very successful because I feel as if there is so much more chasing to do.

Today, I realized that life has been about me for the past 25 years.  I have mentioned God a lot in the past 10 years, but have been so selfish in that even.  God has placed me in different situations here in Kenya to show me that this life is not about me, it really isn't about comfort, it is not about what I want - but what God wants.  I feel like I've known these things, but have finally connected my heart to this idea.   The other day, Heidi and I went running with the kids - she lead & I was the caboose.  As we were running a song came on my iPod that I haven't heard in a while.  The words in the chorus are: "It's all because of this. It's all because of this. We've tasted love, tasted hope, tasted holiness."  This is what life is about.  I have tasted the love, the hope, and the holiness of God.  Now my job: to share that with people: people with disabilities, orphans, widows, black, white, poor, rich - whatever it may be.  My "job" is to be a Christian first/to share the love of Jesus - no matter what worldly title I will have in the next 6 months or 60 years.  


As I close this blog, I write about a verse my friend Katie Mayer wrote in one of the 8 cards she sent with me.  It was the card I opened yesterday and it spoke of being in waiting.  Now, I feel like I am in waiting to see what God has for me - if that means staying in Kenya or coming home and finding a job .... 


"We wait in hope for the Lord; He is our help & our shield. In Him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in His holy name. May Your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in You." Psalm 33:20


He is in control of our lives - not us, no matter what we think.

Campfire, Acoustic Guitar, & Africa ….

Once again, I have slacked off a bit, but definitely wanted to get everyone caught up on some cool opportunities God has presented to me.

 

THURSDAY:  I got to ride my first public matatu to head to Maai Mahiu to visit CTC, daycare/school for people with disabilities.  Rachel and I headed on over and squished into a van, but luckily we got the front seat on the way there … the way back was a different story, but I will leave you on the edge of your seat for a bit.  We got to CTC, and the first thing I felt like I wanted to do was visit with the moms, and prove to them that I came back like I told them I would.  When we peeped our heads in the doorway where they work, and they went crazy – standing, cheering, and screaming.  It was one of the sweetest moments of my life!  Maybe they welcome everyone like that, I’m not sure, but it really made me feel special.  Then we went through and I tried to name them one by one and name their kids while they would cheer each time I got one right.  I would say I got about 70% correct, but definitely didn’t know some of them.  Some of the moms still had my business card from Camp Summit stored in their drawers from the last time I was there!  That meant a lot to me.  We then went to visit the kiddos! A-M-A-Z-I-N-G, of course!  Went into the classroom where I spent a lot of my time the last time I was there, the classroom with George, Ruth, Lucy, and Mike.  George still the same & and still called me Miss Kunyamba (which means “to pollute the air” – their way of saying “fart”).  Reason for this: I brought “flarp” the last time I was here and we all laughed so hard at it.  The teacher even remembered me, once I brought that up. Haha  We got a little crazy again, and took some of the same type of photos again: George jumping in the air expecting us to catch him as he did a toe touch!  The day was such a blessing.  Still praying to run into Zane and Jeremiah this week over there, but we will see.  Rachel and I ran into Paul and went and had some more goat for lunch.  On the matatu ride home, lets just say very interesting.  We sat in the matatu waiting for them to shove 15 grown adults into a van that was built for probably 9 people. 

FRIDAY:  At Naomi’s Village, we had some friends arrive from Sudan: Tim Carney, Jim, and Matt!  We ran over to the IDP camp for just a little bit to visit with Joseph.

SATURDAY: Hung out at Naomi’s Village and played Frisbee, ran around, and reviewed over the game kickball with the kiddos.  Bishop Tiban, from Sudan came to Naomi’s Village to discuss the idea of planting a church. That night we had a little bonfire by the yellow couches.  Our friend, Katie decided to take the responsibility for Baby Evans for the entire night so we could have a rest.  HUGE BLESSING! 

SUNDAY: Church at NV.  I did a short teaching of how God welcomes us into His family and calls those who trust in Jesus His children.  We went for a walk, then Tim and I decided to climb a tree, which was awesome. After dinner, I thought I would try my hardest to get the kids’ energy out and we went running around the building a couple of times, did some jumping jacks, stretched, did situps.  Next time, I will be doing this before dinner so no one gags or throws up.  They had a blast, so I was definitely looking forward to doing this the very next day until …..

MONDAY:  I had been having a scratchy throat since Saturday and I think it all came tumbling down.  I FELT AWFUL!  I was real weak, would get real hot, then real cold.  Couldn’t even hold a peanut butter/jelly sandwich down.  Pretty much all day, I was in bed curled up.  I cried a couple of times and just got real emotional because I didn’t want to be locked up in a room all day feeling like rubbish, but out playing with the kids.  Honestly, just a terrible day.  I don’t really think I took the opportunity to find the good in it, because I felt miserable.  That night Heidi, Tim, and Stephen prayed over me for me to feel better, which made me cry bc I felt terrible.  I moved my things out and to the infirmary so the baby didn’t have me around him.  We did not want him to get sick. 

TUESDAY: The day was much better, still not 100%, but able to actually sit up for the day, walk around, and laugh.  It was so much better than the day before.  The kids’ smiles made my day wonderful today.  Tonight, Heidi, Tim, and I laughed real hard at some random things, which was real good for all of us. 

God is working and I’m excited to see what happens in the next few weeks.  Wednesday should be a day full of stories and adventures.  Will look forward to writing more soon.

In Him,

Lindsey

I Thought I Could, but I Just Couldn't Eat that Bug!!

There is a great purpose of me coming to Kenya again this summer, and that purpose involves working with the precious kids of Naomi’s Village, but the kids are not the purpose.  The purpose is to know more of who God is & God uses the kids to show me this.  Toward the end of last week, I was having a rough time inside because I haven’t been around people with disabilities.  I know with all of my heart that God called me here, know that my main focus would not be working with this population. The lesson that I am about to explain is one that I think I have known for a long time, but I am actually being able to live it out & experience it.  If you know me at all, you know that I might be a little overly giddy about people with disabilities, especially Down syndrome.  I know that God has called me away from that part of my life for a little bit of time because I have loved them so much more than I have loved the One that created them.  GOD created people with disabilities and GOD allowed/blessed me to have the passion of working with that population.  GOD is the reason for the joy that I feel when I am around these people.  GOD shows Himself the best to me through these people – it has nothing to do with anything that these people did, but all that He has done through them and all that He has created them to be.  I am now learning how to love God without having people with disabilities in my daily life, which is something that I don't know if I have ever really done.  I became a Christian in the 8th grade & God showed me what my passion was in 9th grade, so there hasn't been a lot of time to love God without people with disability as my driving motivation to God.  They are not the source in which I get to know more about God – God is the source where I learn more about God.  (Why was that hard for me to know?) 

This is a bit of where my heart has been and I tell ya, it has been so good for me.  I pray that God continue to show who He is in such ways. He is showing me so much through the kids at NV, and wow!! ... How awesome is is that these children were rescued and given such a beautiful place to live with a great opportunity to come to truly know Him.  

Weekly Recap:

• I’ve been teaching English and Math to some of the kiddos at NV, which has surprising been a lot of fun!!!  I’ve never really thought of myself as a teacher, but I have really enjoyed being a part of this.  (It kind of makes me think that maybe, just maybe I will move abroad and teach at some point.)  Some of these kids were never put in schools, so some of them are active 10 year olds, but do not know how to add 122 + 0.  (A concept I was trying to get them to understand, when you add zero to any number, the answer is that number) 

• Heidi Moore arrived in Kenya to be here for at least one year (my roommate for the next 6 weeks)

• Last week was Rachel’s (Dan’s wife) birthday … We had a fun mexican birthday dinner to celebrate her birth. (PS tomorrow 6-16 is Bob’s bday for all that want to wish him a happy bday)

• Bob and Julie got to take some time away and we got to hang out with Emily and Will.  (blast) 

• Gladis wouldn’t barter with me within the 15 minutes we talked, so I left.  She followed.  I ignored.  Some random guy told me to stop and give her respect.  I did.  She gave her spill again.  I listened.  I said I will come back if I want to make purchase.  I have not gone back. 

• As Heidi and I were walking in Kijabe, a lady ran after us asking for 200 Shillings (2 bucks-ish).  We told her we didn’t have anything.  She kept asking.  We told her again we had nothing.  She then asked us for our shoes.  So, to make it stop, we stopped and prayed for her on the side of the road.  She hit up Emily M. the next day for some money for a different story.  L

• Had some good Mama Chiku’s somosas with Dan's family, some people from the ENT House! 

• Met “Mama Chiku”.  Her name is Joyce!

• Last week, we got very close to getting stuck in the mud/hitting another car & motorcycle on the way up the mountain back to Kijabe after some pretty good rain.  (THIS WAS EXCITING)

• A couple of days ago, The Green Hornet (Mendonsa’s Green Toyota Corolla Hatchback) almost got hit by a cow – yes that is right – we almost got hit by a cow.  We almost got hit by a dumb cow that wasn’t going to stop.  I think he was inches away from having a bad migraine.

• I no longer have the ability to just look at Baby Hannah and make her cry!  (Very exciting progress for me.  She is getting used to white people, but I think since I am brown, she is struggling a little more with me! Haha)

• Naomi’s Village got its very first baby, Evans.

• Moving day: we moved down to NV to live.

 (Typical 'Lindsey' face)

• I started on Disc 2 of “Flight of the Conchords”

• Baby Evans moved into our room! 

• Today, we went running for the first time around Maai Mahiu & it was raining.  This was so great and much needed time of contemplation on the things God is doing.  Heidi = a bit faster than me, so I kind of chilled for a few seconds with some kiddos walking from school.  AWKWARD PART: being ‘white’ and being a woman .. and being in shorts running around the dirt roads of Kenya.  People were whistling, laughing (definitely makes you feel a bit uncomfortable haha), people coming to shake your hand, which is not at all abnormal for this neck of the woods, cows/sheep/goat running beside us, overall a different feel, as you would expect.

• Tonight, we ate dinner, busted out the guitar to sing some songs, then the kids walked outside and went crazy!!!  WOW!!!  There were bugs flying everywhere around the lights.  What does anyone do when that happens??? EAT THEM, OF COURSE!!!  The kids were jumping, screaming, catching them, some were pulling the wings off and shoving them in their mouths, while others didn’t bother to pull wings off at all!  They definitely tried to get me to eat one, which I’ve eaten a worm before so I thought I could do this too – NO!  I COULDN’T DO IT!  The bugs’ legs were just too squirmy!  But, I heard they taste sweet!

It has been a full couple of weeks, and so good for my heart the past couple of days. 

Thank you for your prayers. 

I am praying that God put more people in my life that I can share Christ with.  I would love to walk through some villages, and just pray with people, but I’m not sure that will happen.

Tomorrow: I will get to ride in a Matatu with probably 30 other Kenyans.   I am going to Comfort the Children (daycare for people with disabilities) to see some of my friends that I met the last time I was here!  (George calls me Miss Kunyamba).  I’m happy and I pray that when I am there, I continue to lavish in what God has taught me how to love Him so much more because He created these people and put them as such a big part of my life. 

ALL THE HALF-MEXICANS IN AMERICA!

Laffy Taffy Joke of the Day:  Where do really smart hotdogs go? … Honor Roll

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GREAT AUNT MASTER HILDA!!  LOVE YOU

(today is my aunt's birthday, & she used to make my sister call her this when we were little! haha)

I am going to try and cut this short, but I am not a person of few words.  Today, there was mixed emotions all across the board.  The morning, honestly, my heart was not in the right place.  There was a silly situation in which I somewhat got a bit annoyed or upset, and I allowed it to somewhat affect the mood I was in.  As the day progressed, I asked God to take that away and move on from it….what do ya know? … God answered loudly.

Today, Julie was scheduled to go pick up 2 girls from their “houses” and I was planning on staying at the orphanage and hanging out with the kids, but God had a different plan, as I was given the opportunity to ride along & pick the girls up with the Naomi’s Village gang.

The first “house” we stepped into was across the street from Comfort the Children, and probably smaller than an average size bathroom, where 11 people lived.  Emily was precious, of course.  She was a bit shy, yet doing pretty good with everything going on.  As we stuffed 9 + adults into the “living room”, children began to gather around the front door.  I thought it would be a good idea to get them away so I went and just talked with them for a bit. 

One of them asked me if I was from CTC, which is the daycare for people with disabilities across the street.  I told him no, but said that I had been there before and asked if he had been there.  He told me he had, then began to chuckle.  (in my head I thought: great opportunity to educate!!)  I have never been able ‘educate’ anyone in another country about people with disabilities, so I was real excited.  Anyway, God gave me a chance to tell these kids that God loves kids at CTC just as much as God loves them.  It was an opportunity I've been praying for in order to help kids treat others with disabilities just like they would any other kid.  They are the same, just may need a little more assistance.  Then the Naomi’s Village gang gave out candy to these kids, and I told him if he took this laffy taffy, he better think real hard the next time when he sees someone like the kids at CTC – he better be nice and remember that God created them.  It was a great convo! ;-)

 The little guy 2nd from the left is the one who I was talking to about people w/disabilities.  Classic!

 left: Emily, right: Catherine

We got in the car and began on the next expedition to the next house to pick up Catherine.  Catherine’s uncle and grandmother were waiting at the fence for Naomi’s Village to come, cheering and ready for a better life for sweet Catherine.  We went into the house to talk for awhile and Catherine had all the excitement in the world to be moving to Naomi’s Village and being able to go to her dream school.  In these moments gathered in this house, I thought of the excitement this girl had all over her face, and she didn’t even know what really awaited her.  She had no idea what Naomi’s Village looked like, yet she knew it was a better place.  I couldn’t help but think of how this completely relates to all of us.  God has so many things ahead of us, the greatest being eternity with Him.  How exciting!  How often do I think that life is so good here on earth and how I would at times prefer to continue life here rather than Jesus come back.  Eternity with Jesus is something we cannot even begin to really imagine, but is ahead for those that choose to surrender their lives to Christ.  I pray that I desire and get excited about that, even more so than Catherine about Naomi’s Village.

NO MORE "GOAT IN THE POCKET" TRICK!

Laffy Taffy Joke of the day: What type of fish swims at night? …. A STAR FISH!!!

Today was filled with laughter, smiles, and good times with Jesus. 

Today, I spent some time in the classroom with Paul, Anne, and Millicent.  I am getting a chance to observe a bit and learned some Swahili and Kikuyu along the way!!  I know how to say the letters of these words in Swahili: “Rainy”, “windy” “cloudy”, and “calm”.  If you haven’t guess it, the kids were learning how to say, spell, and write words related to…. (drum roll please)…..WEATHER!!!  Today was calm, but now rainy & windy (PS). 

After doing a little observation, I went in the younger kids’ room so we could try to bond.  The one in the pink jacket loved her nails being painted!! 

I was able to go with Bob and Julie to a Cure event held at a little Butchery in Maai Mahiu.  You see, in my past experience in Kenya, my team pretty much decided that we did not like goat.  We might have even had a little fun with it back then – meaning it may have ended up in some of our pockets instead of our mouths.  Well, goat has redeemed itself in my book.  It was good – well cooked – well seasoned – well done! 

One of the highs for me today was being able to have a little time with the Lord.  After we ate yummy spaghetti, I was able to sit on the porch and play my guitar and just press into the Lord a bit.  The Mendonsas, Dan & fam, Jillian, and I went up to the RVA, which is a boarding school for missionary kids, to have a time of worship.

Things were great, but the lights kept on going on and off, on and off, on and off.  It was funny at first, then it got old, but I felt like I should try to find out what God was telling me through this little situation.  Right as Shane began to sing, it shut off again.  I thought Satan is sure trying to prevent something good from happening tonight … dang Satan!  Shane gave up, stepped away from the microphone, and we sang “You’re Beautiful” by Phil Wickam - without sound equipment.  I am a huge sucker for an acoustic guitar, but there is something about God’s church singing without loud speakers, with the lights out. 

I thought about how this God that we serve really is so beautiful.  We couldn’t clearly see anything else around us, but yet we were able to clearly see God and worship Him – the only One who has the power to save us.  We also sang these words with just our voices: “All I need is You Lord, is You Lord.  All I need is You.”  How often to I actually cling to that?  There is so much in life that I want and many of those times I may not want what Jesus wants for me, but all I NEED is Him. With Him, we have everything.  That doesn’t mean all the things we want, but all the things we need … and all that we NEED is Him.  

I met a kid named .... I can't spell it or pronounce it.

First, I want to say thank you for all of your prayers, as they were felt.  The flight and arrival went very smoothly.  Yesterday was a great day to reflect on how far the actual building of Naomi’s Village has come since the last time I was here.  I kept on thinking that all of this started with a vision that God gave one person … and now that vision is alive and real because of obedience.  If you have ever met the Mendonsas, you know this when I say just how blessed I am to be here serving Christ alongside them this summer. 

Today has been filled with tons of excitement:

 Doreen leading some songs with the kids and the group that was at NV today!  JUST AMAZING!

 This kid is hilarious!  He kind of colored his face and the rest of himself with sidewalk chalk today!

The kids busted out some sidewalk chalk today for the very first time.  It was a hit!  

@Melissa Kauk: look very closely at what little Anne wrote!!

@Katie Mayer:  The “kunyumba” tool that was sent in today’s card might be sound a little like a duck call.  It made Julie and me laugh.  The thing I tried new today: I actually said the word "kunyumba" to a little boy, because he definitely wasn't smiling, so what other way to make him smile than to say a funny word.  So the thing that was new about this: I tried to take it back and erase his memory that I said it. haha

Today, again was great.  A lot really happened today and I wish that I could tell you all the stories and about all the smiles, but my brain is a little bit tired today.

Thank you again for the prayers and I look forward to telling you some fun stories.

-Lindsey 

I am His beloved.

Today, I hope to leave for Kenya and the things I had concerns with, I have no more.  Prayer answered: God took away some fears I had about traveling.  Now, my concern is just simply for my heart.  My heart has been in a little rut the past couple of weeks and has felt like it was at its max in the past few days.  The anticipation for the trip has been much and unfortunately, I took it out on a person I love the most.  Like I said in my previous blog, I believe there have been things thrown in front of me trying to prevent me from going, but each time I feel God there saying “Stand up and stay strong.  Lean on Me; have faith.”

On my last day at Camp Summit, I walked out of the building, able to rejoice in what God was doing even though I had no idea what was to come and still is to come!  I got in my car, turned on the radio, and just sat in the midst of Him for as I drove.  I felt like I had been standing on the ledge since January 27^th and now, I had just jumped off.  I was now completely in God’s hands with no security of a job or a paycheck, but full security in Christ.  I began to laugh out loud.  It was a great feeling of comfort and peace and excitement. 

I know God has something great because the enemy is trying to be very involved with things in my life.  The joy that God has put in my heart, the enemy is trying to take away, and I do ask for prayer about this.  I am so excited to see what God is doing in the lives of the kids at Naomi’s Village.  I am praying that I get the opportunity not to just love on them, but to share the greatest Love of all with them and with others around.  My focus about this trip has been to love the kids and to learn something about God along the way.  But wow – it is so much more than that.  It is to love the kids like Jesus loved me – so that they might know Him, love Him, and spend ETERNITY with Him.  It is not just to learn something about God.  I yearn to really know Jesus more.  I don’t want to continue on this journey of being on the end of receiving great blessings, but I want to give my heart and soul to serving and living my life for Him because He is worthy of that.  He is worthy of me being labeled as “unemployed” for this portion of my life; He is worthy for me to lose my life because I know that I will gain it in Him.  (Matthew 16:25)  He is worthy; He is worthy; He is worthy of so much more than I give Him in my everyday life, and yet He still delights in me and loves me in the midst of my selfishness, pride, and all the other yucky stuff.  I am His beloved and He sings over me in delight. (Zephaniah 3:17).  I am so grateful.

To end more on a silly note because I am not the best at always being serious:

The past couple of days, I prayed to be upgraded on the plane. Well, since I my flight got cancelled yesterday, two great things happened: 1. I was able to worship once more with the body of believers from The Village Church and 2. I was upgraded because there was no more room on economy!!!  I was real excited (and makes me super excited just typing about it right now). I’ve never flown anything besides economy, so I think I might stay awake all the way to London to soak it up a bit. Haha

God is so good, even in silly prayers we pray as a joke.  He is good with the people that I have been blessed to know.  Words cannot express how much love I have for people and my prayer is that I begin to show that a whole lot more than what I have been.  (1 John 3:18: Dear Children, let us not love with words or tongue, but with action and in truth.)

Thank you and I look forward to writing again from Kenya.

And So it Begins

Last September, God allowed me to travel to Kenya with an amazing group of people from The Village Church.  It was those two weeks that a dream I've had for 6 or 7 years finally came true.  Through this trip, God got a hold of me.  When getting back to the states, there was not one day that went by that I didn't think about what life was like outside of the US.  It is a world that many Americans will never experience and never fully understand.  It is crazy to think that more of the world lives like people in Kenya then people in the US.  I am grateful for the "things" of the United States, but also grateful for the "nothings" of a third world country.  I have seen, but not experienced, what it is like to have nothing and still be whole-heartedly be in love with God.  This is something that I long for more now than ever.

As I got back, I began to pray and ask myself "Am I really doing all I can for the glory of God?"  I didn't know how to answer, but felt like there was something out there - something to pursue hard after - not knowing what that was.  Later, I developed two pictures in my mind: 1. God and me staring at each other face to face and looking square in the eyes of one another  and 2. This teeny tiny Lindsey standing in the  almighty, powerful, huge palms of God.   I also began to talk with Julie Mendonsa about the thought of coming there summer of 2011, not really feeling God was leading me in a certain direction, but just felt we should be praying.  As the new year rolled around, I felt like God told me to work on three things: 1. Becoming a woman of prayer 2. Being a servant for Him and 3. Increasing my faith in Him.

As time went on, I went back and forth with the idea of having to quit my job as Assistant Camp Director at a camp for children and adults with special needs (my passion).  There were days when I felt like God said yes and there were days when I felt like He said no.  I fasted, prayed face flat on the floor.  One day, I sat in my living room with several things going on around me and I saw a short clip of my trip that September and felt an immediate overwhelming sense of peace.  That's when I knew what I had to do next.

I put my notice in about a week and a half to two weeks later - scared as all get out, by scared I mean, the thought of not having a job upon return and scared of losing the campers.  I have never felt more like this wasn't a choice of "What was better - Kenya or camp?", but "Who is better than both Kenya and camp?"  One person said "You've just gotten over one of the hardest mountains and there will be more that you will have to climb before your time comes to leave."  I will be honest in saying, I thought the resignation conversation was going to be the hardest part, but it wasn't.  Since the conversation, my grandfather has had three surgeries: 1. Triple bypass 2. infection that was pretty severe because of his coughing ripping up his sternum and 3. Repair surgery of his sternum, which should actually say "the removing" of his sternum.  While in Florida for his surgery, found out my step-mother, who had breast cancer was sent home because she was doing so well.  What the doctors did not know at the time was that her breast cancer had turned into brain cancer and had to have emergency surgery the day we were flying back from Florida.  As I watched my father, a man who wasn't really there for his children, love this woman as she was hurting - I knew that this was completely about his heart with the Lord.  Shortly after things somewhat hit a plateau something else would come up - another one being, having to deal with some false religion in my family and how satan can hide so easily, even for Christians to get confused as to what God is saying.  This is very vague, but was a pretty hurtful situation.

As I have watched life unfold over the past two and a half months, I have never felt more like Satan was trying to gain control of something in my life.  I've had to completely make myself stop thinking about what these people were feeling and look directly at what God was doing through this time in me.  It was increasing my faith, getting me to pray like I never really had before, and forcing me to stare directly into God's eyes and trust.  These situations have so many little details, some instances where there was no explanation other than the real presence of the Lord, which I had never felt.

All this to say, this blog is for what life will look like within the next 3 months as I prepare to go to Kenya for a couple of months, and what happens while I am there.  I am very ready to go see what God has, because I know it is soo good and soo sweet because Satan is trying hard to keep me from it.

Thank you and I look forward to God's plan unfolding.

Much Love,

Lindsey